Latest entries tagged in sex

From Google Analytics.

Yesterday, my daily visits improved by, wait for it;

15,288.89%

Thank you girl-toy. I will summon your powers in the future!
Perhaps when I figure out how adsense works.. Ahh, big business.

The girlfriend is, on the other hand, very suprised, but pleased with the outcome. Thank you my fellow faphunters.

My girlfriend posing in a bikini by Longum for your benefit. Hope you enjoy, and remember that when these kind of shots appear here, this should dramatically simplify your facebook stalking needs from our behalf. Go ahead, remove us from fb, do yourself a favour.

By the way, you really do not want to look at her like that, she might like it as much as you do.

Also, as a final warning to parents who still continue to defy my admonishments about browsing my site. Herein lies only semi-naked girls serving only as a depressing reminder of our bodily deterioration. For the normal internet demographic it serves different purposes. We youngsters call it research.

Holly made this for me before Valentines. I'll say it is way too good to be just stashed away, but some of you might fervently try and close the browser shouting impure! impure!



Honey, there are more things about this drawing that you've got right.

Not the thing I do normally, but in the spirit of Yule, I made my sex crazed girlfriend a Christmas song. If no one else appreciates it, she does. You all know the twelve days of Christmas. Good.

This should really be sung or made into a song, as no way am I singing - and you should be happy about that. Oh, and this really is no family zone. If you read this, you relinquish your right to talk to me about it.

Anyway, this is the full song written out. Here are the first two.

On the first day of christmas,
my true love gave to me
A brand new STD.

On the second day of christmas,
my true love gave to me
Two sagging boobs
and a brand new STD

yes.

There once was a bad hungry glutton
She could never quite find her button,
But one day she squirmed
She felt something firm,
Now always she fucks with her bottom.

limericks: not suitable for school curriculum

It's becoming apparent, after a plethora of conversation where I may or may not divulge too much, that few people share the same passion for random neurological explorations as I do. However, discussions almost unanimously end up assessing that fish is meat, so that one I'll just have to let go despite how wrong thesaurus would tell them they are.

There are quite a lot of vegetarians here not surprisingly, and while hypothetical questions are answered, they are seldom entertained - as that weird guy in the corner who sometimes laughs out loud of his own thoughts would. You would think that if fish grew from the seabed, it would have serious ethical ramifications for vegetarians, not to mention all the humorous situations that might arise from such a glorious mental scene. I'll move away from this digression soon, but please try to share the amusement inherent in a shark staring romantically at the surface - or the blurred sky, whatever you call it from below - and while having nothing better to do, just knocks his neighboring fish over like an inverted punching bag.

Another thing that might seem a tad off is my newly acquired lust for angry sex. The true story behind this is that I did a little acting after another hypothetical question that was impulsively decided to be too good to be true. My point was that since catholic sex was not to be enjoyed, angry sex has to be a great loophole - and a decidedly real one judging from all the headlines from overly religious countries. It doesn't exactly help my case that I know that videos containing such material are illegal in Britain, a fact I'm incapable of concealing, but I think the accusations are all made in good sport. Like the sign on my door that says that I'm wanking really hard. I don't value their right to put stuff whatever they want on my door, but it does give me the option of explaining away whatever the hell I'm actually doing late at night.

Also, to notify all family members who for some reason suddenly decided to tell each other about my blog and actually read it; disregard everything I say. Always.

I don't hate me